Corny Dog Riddles
Which dog tastes better when eaten? A hot dog.
Which side of a dog has the most hair? The outside, of course.
Who gave the dog a black eye? Nobody gave it to him. He had to fight for it.
Why are dogs such poor dancers? They have two left feet.
Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato fell on his head? The tomato was in a can.
Why did the dog jump off the Empire State Building? He wanted to make a hit on Broadway.
Why did the dog jump up and down on the potato patch? He hoped to raise mashed potatoes.
Why did the dog mistake the dog catcher for a grape? He was colour-blind.
Why did the dog run in circles? He was a watchdog and needed winding.
Why did the dog say he was an actor? His leg was in a cast.
How do you catch a runaway dog ? Hide behind a tree and make a noise like a bone!
What dog loves to take bubble baths ? A shampoodle !
What kind of dog does a vampire prefer ? Any kind of bloodhound!
What dogs are best for sending telegrams ? Wire haired terriers!!
What do you call a happy Lassie ? A jolly collie!
What do you call a nutty dog in Australia ? A dingo-ling!
What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers ? A bud hound!
Why didn’t the dog speak to his foot ? Because it’s not polite to talk back to your paw!
What is the dogs favourite city ? New Yorkie!
Who is the dogs favourite comedian ? Growlcho Marx!
What did the cowboy say when the bear ate Lassie? “Well, doggone !”
What do you get if you take a really big dog out for a walk ? A Great Dane out !
What kind of meat do you give a stupid dog ? Chump chops !
What sort of clothes does a pet dog wear ? A petticoat !
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a rose? A collie-flower !
Why did the dachshund bite the woman’s ankle ? Because he was short and couldn’t reach any higher !
Why did the snowman call his dog Frost ? Because frost bites !
Why did the poor dog chase his own tail ? He was trying to make both ends meet !
Where does a Rottweiller sit in the cinema ? Anywhere it wants to !
What did the angry man sing when he found his slippers chewed up by the new puppy ? “I must throw that doggie out the window !”!
Why do dogs wag their tails ? “Because no one else will do it for them !”
What happened to the dog that ate nothing but garlic ? His bark was much worse than it’s bite !
Why do dogs bury bones in the ground ? Because you can’t bury them in trees !
What happened when the dog went to the flea circus ? He stole the show !
How can if you have a stupid dog ? It chases parked cars !
What do you get if you cross a dog with Concorde ? A jet setter !
Why did the dog wear white sneakers ? Because his boots were at the menders !
What do you get if you cross a giraffe with a dog ? An animal that barks at low flying aircraft !
Where do Eskimos train their dogs ? In the mush room !
What is the difference between Father Christmas and a warm dog ? Father Christmas wears a whole suit, a dog just pants!
When is the most likely time that a stray dog will walk into your house ? When the door is open !
What do you get if you cross a dog and a cheetah ? A dog that chases cars – and catches them !
What happens when it rains cats and dogs ? You can step in a poodle !
What kind of dog does Dracula have ? A bloodhound !
What is the only kind of dog you can eat ? A hot dog !
What kind of dog sounds like you can eat it ? A sausage dog !
What did the hungry Dalmatian say when he had a meal ? That hit the spots !
What do you do if your dog eats your pen ? Use a pencil instead !
Why don’t dogs make good dancers ? Because they have two left feet !
What do you get if you cross a Rottweiller and a hyena ? I don’t know but I’ll join in if it laughs !
What do dogs have that no other animal has ? Puppy dogs !
What do you call an alcoholic dog ? A whino !
What is a dog’s favourite sport ? Formula 1 drooling !
What is a dog’s favourite food ? Anything that is on your plate !
What dog wears contact lenses ? A cock-eyed spaniel !
What is a dogs favourite flower ? Anything in your garden !
What’s a dog favourite hobby ? Collecting fleas !
How many seasons are there in a dogs life ? Just one, the moulting season !
Why is it called a “litter” of puppies ? Because they mess up the whole house !
How do you stop a dog smelling ? Put a peg on it’s nose !
What is the best time to take a Rottweiler for a walk ? Any times he wants to !
When does a dog go “moo” ? When it is learning a new language !
What kind of dog chases anything red ? A bull dog !
What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals ? A guard dog !
What do you call a dog in jeans and a sweater ? A plain clothes police dog !
What do you get if you cross a sheepdog with a jelly ? The collie wobbles !
Why do you need a licence for a dog and not for a cat ? Cats can’t drive !
What do you call a dog in the middle of a muddy road ? A mutt in a rut !
When is a black dog not a black dog ? When it’s a greyhound !
What do you get if you cross a dog with a blind mole ? A dog that keeps barking up the wrong tree !
Being a brand new puppy owner I truly appreciate all the tips listed here. I would like my furry friend to get very well trained and have a healthy and balanced environment to live in. Many thanks for the information.
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Found your site very interesting, full of informative articles, added to my favourites.
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Loved your insight!! For once someone got everything correct!! Would you mind if I put a blogroll link back to your post?
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these are cute, I just had to print them and give them to my friend who loves dogs. I am sure this will make her day. Thank you for gathering them.
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